Taken from Lynne’s weekly column ‘Green Scene’ for the Western Mail
1st April 2023
April Fool Fun
I have had a lovely time researching and ordering a few packets of unusual seeds to try this season, as well as the Heirloom and more traditional varieties.
One of the first ‘novelties’ I found was the Strawberry Spinach. Available from www.marshallsgarden.com the enticing description reads, “An attractive and rare leafy salad plant and all parts can be eaten. Pick the spinach-shaped leaves, with a satisfyingly nutty flavour as you would regular spinach, starting from baby leaves within the few weeks on germination and allowing the plant to grow so you can enjoy the mature leaves with that bit of bite. In summer your leafy plants flower and fruit. We recommend you harvest the ripe red berries, which have a mild sweetness and crunchy texture. Dig up the parsnip-like roots after fruiting and enjoy washed and sliced for salads. Alternatively cook for nourishing soups.
And no, Strawberry Spinach is not an April Fools joke – unlike Thompson and Morgan’s ‘special offer’ a few years ago. Their press release read, “The latest innovation from the Thompson & Morgan Grafting Programme is the Gin and Tonic Tree, offering juniper berries and quinine bark from the same tree.
Following the success of the dual-cropping Tomtato® (tomatoes and potatoes from one plant) and Egg & Chips® (aubergines and potatoes on one plant), Thompson & Morgan is pleased to introduce its latest innovation in grafting technology. The Gin & Tonic Tree™ is set to be the first in a series of grow-your-own beverages and customers can expect to see the Vermouth Vine and Sherry Cherry following in future years.
Thompson and Morgan recommends growing The Gin & Tonic Tree™ alongside a lemon tree to complete the ingredient list.”
As well as sending this out as a Press Release, customers received an email and whilst I didn’t actually order one, I must admit to being half way through writing up this ‘great grafting technology’ for my column, before becoming suspicious and checking the date.
It’s worth noting that both the Tomtato and Egg (Eggplant) & Chips plants are actually available from www.thompson-morgan.com
The tricksters at Thompson & Morgan came up with another April Fools folly the following year issuing a press release about an amazing new technical PowerFlower product. They claimed their waterproof USB port could be inserted into the stem of a houseplant and would then utilise the plant’s ‘energy’ to charge up a phone or iPad.
Although I’m sure that might have been more of a premonition than a prank, the way we are going.
Of course the classic horticultural hoax was BBC’s Panorama programme showing a family in Switzerland harvesting spaghetti from a tree. First shown in 1957 when spaghetti wasn’t as familiar as it is now, many people were fooled and phoned in to ask how they could grow their own spaghetti trees. The BBC replied, ‘place a sprig of spaghetti in a tin of tomato sauce and hope for the best’. How times have changed.
But possibly the easiest horticultural April Fool’s prank to deliver is to give an aspiring gardener some ‘donut seeds’ so they can grow their own sugary snack … simply hand them a small bag of Cheerios.
Dog Bless
I was invited to appear on the Paul O’Grady Show on the 6th April 2009 (some dates are memorable) to show people how they could grow vegetables in small spaces using random containers. I was very much looking forward to meeting Paul after a brief but heart-warming exchange with him over the phone about rescuing pet pigs. Unfortunately Paul was ill that week and instead I appeared with Dermot O’Leary. As the show was live, I was briefed with a rough outline of what Dermot would ask and how he would introduce me. So it was a complete surprise when he mischievously went ‘off script’ and introduced me as Wales’ Sexiest Gardener – referring to an award I had recently received.
In the Green Room, after the show, Dermot apologised to me for the ‘surprise introduction’ and also for ‘throwing the potatoes into the audience’. I had appeared on the show with fellow guest, Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson (and Paul Merton) who overheard Dermot’s Green Room apology and asked me (with a grin) “Is this guy bothering you? I saw him shoot those potatoes. Let me know if you want him sorted out.” Great memories.
Last year, I met Paul O’Grady at Chelsea Flower Show. He was a delight to interview and I couldn’t help but tell him I had ‘missed him’ on his own show all those years ago.
‘Well, we were obviously destined to meet,‘ he said kindly. ‘And I for one think it was worth waiting for.‘ Such a wonderfully kind and ‘memory-making’ thing to say, and a true example of the thoughtful and gentle man he was.
Flower Forecasts
It always fascinates me that magnolias have such a variable flowering time depending on their locations and positions. Both stellata and soulangina varieties are in bloom much earlier in Cardiff than here in Crickhowell and even just a few miles apart locally can make a difference by up to a week or so too.
So spare a thought for travellers planning to visit Japan’s famous cherry blossoms. In 2007, the national Japan Meteorological Agency was a ‘trip-changing’ nine days out when predicting the start of the blooming period. To avoid that happening again, private companies now employ teams of people to take temperature readings and monitor the progress of specific trees. And with great success – this month one company managed to predict Tokyo’s first blooms to within one day.
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